Buzzed Bobby
In “The Sting,” a sixth-season “Dallas” episode, an anxious Donna (Susan Howard) is on the phone in her living room.
DONNA: Bobby isn’t there either? Uh-huh. Then you haven’t heard from either one of them? Well, do me a favor, Teresa. If Ray comes up there, would you tell him to call me at home? OK, bye.
She hears rustling outside. The patio door slides open and a tipsy Bobby and Ray (Patrick Duffy, Steve Kanaly) enter.
BOBBY: [Giggly] Hi.
DONNA: Where have you been? [Ray walks toward the kitchen, followed by Bobby.] Well, maybe I need to make some coffee.
BOBBY: Oh, wait a minute now. We’re not drunk.
DONNA: Well, you could have fooled me.
RAY: Now, hold on. [Laughs, tosses Bobby a beer] Here! Just what you need, huh? [Slaps him on the shoulder] We just had a couple of beers in celebration. [Laughs, plops on the sofa]
DONNA: Well, celebration. That’s terrific. I guess you know you’ve had me half worried to death!
RAY: Worried? Why?
DONNA: Why? [Motions toward Bobby] Ever since he called, you two have been running around like crazy. I mean, you don’t tell me why or what for! Do you know what time it is?
RAY: [Rises, approaches her] Oh, honey. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.
DONNA: You know you could have called your wife, Ray Krebbs. Would you like to tell me what it is you’re celebrating?
RAY: Think we ought to tell her?
BOBBY: [Slurry] We rode out in the spirit of John Wayne, Donna.
RAY: Yeah, we headed J.R. off at the pass. [Guffaws]
DONNA: What are you talking about?
BOBBY: OK, in plain English?
DONNA: Please.
BOBBY: [Deadpan] J.R. … [Cracks up, along with Ray] will never sell guns to the Indians again!
